An interesting thing about prospecting is that when you think about it, just like a first date, where you want to do more asking, and talking, you’ll have a much easier time connecting with people, building your team and creating the income you truly really deserve.

Today we’re going to talk about how prospecting should be treated just like a first date. So, if you’re reading this and you’ve been married for a long time or if you’re with the same person for a long time, you might forget the feeling of dating but I’m going to give you a resurgence with that. So, think about prospecting as a first date. You don’t know the person you’re trying to find things in common with, you’re trying to create that rapport and that relationship between the two of you. I have three simple tips that if you implement this, in the way that I’ve implemented in my businesses,you’re going to see great results. 

So number one, ask more and talk less. This sounds so simple, but it’s so true because so many people feel like they have to do more selling and telling than actually connecting. So stop selling and telling and do more connecting and listening. If you’re doing all the talking, you’ve already said yes and you’re not looking to convince someone to say yes. You want them to want to say yes. You do that by making it about them, just like a first date, when you’re going out with that guy you’re going out with that girl, what do you do?  You sit there, you ask questions. What do you do for a profession? What are some of your hobbies? What do you love most about this, what do you love most about that?  Where have you traveled to? What’s your favorite book? 

Did you play sports in high school? All of those questions, lead to creating connections. If you can create a connection that starts to build rapport, build relationship trust, and that will start to come down where you feel more comfortable with that person. So the more that you ask, the less that you talk, the better the connection will be. 

Number two, with those questions, you will then start to find things in common. What happens when you start to find things in common?The conversation goes deeper, you start to feel like you “know the person”. I’ve been to a lot of personal development events in my career and I’ve been to events where they actually move you around the room, sit you next to someone that you don’t know at all, and say “I’m going to give you a minute and a half you find three things in common”. Wouldn’t you know it, you can find three things in common. Whether it’s you’re both married, you both have kids., you both have your own businesses, or you both love working out. All of those things are common interests, and everyone says in the business world you’re looking to find your tribe. What I can tell you is that the best way that you find your tribe, is that you find things in common. The only way you know that you have the ability to connect with someone else is if you ask those questions that lead to finding things that show you different things in common. 

Number three, and in my humble opinion, the most important, is that you show genuine interest. This is really big. I was actually speaking to a friend of mine the other day and she was sharing with me what was frustrating her most about the business and she felt like she was being taught to not be genuine. They were telling her she should connect with people just to connect with them, to pitch them the opportunity or the product. I said, I get it, that feels yucky, it feels icky. No one wants to do that, no one wants to just sell. You want to leave your friends and family alone, you don’t want to just connect with someone to actually just connect with them, just to pitch your product or pitch your business. You want to do it in such a way where you’re actually looking to engage with that person, not for the end result of getting them into your business but forming a relationship and if it comes up in conversation, then it could lead to a collaboration and what you’re looking to do. So when you show genuine interest, and you really have no agenda. Now, do you want to mention it?  Absolutely. If it comes up. Sometimes the agenda is not there, and it never comes up but you end up making a great connection, just like you may have a great first date. But that’s all it may be. You’re both good people, you’re just not attracted to each other, but thank you but I don’t feel we should see each other again. It’s just like that, or if you show enough genuine interest you really from those connections you find those things in common, it could lead to finding your tribe.

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